The Old Boiler

“BRRP” “BRRP” “BRRP” “BRRP”
“Hello?”

“Alan? It’s Jackie, Don’s Ex ... you know?”
“Oh, yeah ... Hi Jackie, how’s it going?”

“Err .. well, OK I guess, but things could be better.”
“Oh sorry to hear that, how can I help?”
“Well ..... Do you still service ‘Old Boilers’?”

“When I can, I like tinkering with them, why do you ask?”
“Can you service this one, it’s 46 years old!”
Yes, sure ... but I can’t come round yet, give you a few tips though, just to get it running smoother until I can, OK?”
“Great!”

“Now I can picture it in my mind, two round balloons in front with a little red knob in the middle of each, they’re the Bellows ....”
“Yes, a bit saggy though ...”

“Oh with a little massage they will soon get back in shape... Cup your hands, take a balloon in each and gently start to massage them, roll your palms over and round each red knob, with your thumb gently rub them ... feel them getting firmer, harder?”
“Mmmm, oh yes.”

“Keep massaging with your palms ... now pinch the hardening buds between finger and thumb, twist and squeeze them gently .... pull them erect ..... flick a fingernail over them, they love it ..... Are they responding?”

“Ohhh yes .. I can feel them getting hard, firm and sooo much more sensitive ... mmm yes.”
“Wait, it gets better! ..... Between the two down pipes below is a little hole, covered with two small flaps ... move one hand down to it ... feel it?”
“Ohh yeah, I can feel it!”

“Good, that’s my girl ... Keep massaging those balloons alternating between each, don’t forget to pinch the bud every now and then... “
“Ooooh yeah! Ahhhh, oh god yes ... !”

“Now, using your finger begin touching the flaps below, gently at first after all ‘Old Boilers’ are a bit leathery, rub your finger up and down the groove between and you should feel them parting slightly ... Yes?”

“Ohhh Yes! Ohhh god, YES!”
“Work your finger, rubbing and caressing those flaps .... can you feel them getting thicker? More ‘Fleshy’?”
“Ohh my god! Yes, ohhh yes! Ahhhh!”

“Good!.. Mmmm, yeah, I can imagine what it must feel like ... touching and caressing the flaps ... massaging those lovely balloons ... mmmmm.”
“Ahhhhh, it’s getting hotter inside Alan, should it?”

“Yes, it definitely should ... it proves mmm .... still in good working order! Now Jackie, take your finger and gently ease it up inside the hole .... slowly at first it will be a bit tight and you don’t want to tear anything vital inside.”

“Ahhh, ohhhh yes ... nnnnng!”
“That’s it Jackie .. gentle strokes up and down inside the hole ... feel the lubrication starting ... the heat burning against your finger ... Ohhh, yes!”
“Mmmmm, god! Ohhh God! Yeah ... “

“You seem to get as much pleasure from ‘Servicing’ the Old Boiler as I do! Work your finger in and out ... massage those Balloons .. tweak the erect buds ... Mmmm, yeah. Wish I was there with you .... Ohhh!”

“Arrgh! Ohhh god it’s working .. working... I can feel my heat now, feel the juice flowing from my hole ... Aaaahhhh, oh fuck ....”
“Jackie? Jackie? Hello, you still there?”

“Come ... over ... Aahh ... now ... Ohhh please, please! Now, now .... nowwwww!”
“Hang on Jackie I coming right over!”