The Grange

Chapter 1

This is a story of pure fantasy. It has no basis in fact as far as I am aware and none of the characters are real life characters. But perhaps this is the way in which politicians do react when their wives get more publicity than they do?.

The Prime Minister was not amused as he threw the weekend newspapers on to the cabinet table at 10 Downing Street saying. “Two more headlines about Ministers wives. One even reported catching a ministers wife caught in the act of sucking cock in the members car park. With a photograph leaving very little to the imagination.”

There followed a silence as the members of his inner cabinet read the various versions of the press reports.

“It would have be an opposition back bencher’s cock as well . ”

Said the Home Secretary facetiously. The resulting glare from the prime minister drove him back to reading the reports in silence. The Prime Minister then went on.

“Then there is this report about Lord Soames wife who was apparently a call girl when he married her, not only that but last week you may recall that we had a report from a night club that the Member for Seaforth’s wife, danced on a night club table not wearing any underwear. She was the worse for drink and that apparently was not the first time she had done that.”

The Home Secretary looked up at the prime Ministers angry face. ”Prime Minister I thought it was really not the done thing for the leader of the opposition to ask that question last Wednesday relating to the cock sucking incident and asking whether cabinet ministers wives were bringing the government into disrepute and also asking the question what did you intend to do about it?. It also made it worse by his statement that he, had withdrawn the whip from his member for conduct unbecoming to a Member of Parliament.”

The Home Secretary pointed out “The press have taken this up and they are now suggesting facetiously that the Prime Minister should take the whip to the offending members wives. They are asking what action the Prime Minister proposed taking against the wives concerned, but there is nothing we can do legally.”

“ What can we do? The Prime Minister asked the Lord Chancellor.

“If we could get the police to prosecute any of them for lewd behaviour, they would only get a slap on the wrist and we would create more adverse publicity and with our small majority, we could have all this blown out of proportion and that could lose us the bye elections in three weeks time and that in turn could bring the government down and force a general election. If we lose those three seats we are finished, we would no longer have a majority in the house and then we will have to face a full election. ”

The Foreign Secretary made the point “This does not help our standing in the international community, so we must do something. The French newspapers in particular, are really loving it”

The Prime Minister looked at him cynically and said “George we have not mentioned your wife and her despicable behaviour when she grabbed my balls at the Christmas Party last year in front of everyone.”

“But she has not done it since Prime Minister has she?”

“ No George, ,I have made sure I don’t get near enough to her. But I have had reports that some people have not taken evasive action as I have, or been fast enough on their feet” their was a titter of laughter from the other ministers present.

After a lot of discussion it was agreed that the following week as a matter of urgency the Prime Minister would consider possible alternatives to deal with the situation asking members to let him have any ideas.

“You must not trust your Secretary’s with any notes or Memos. I want it from you all verbally. No leaks are permissible.”

The Home Secretary stayed behind to speak to the Prime Minister. “I think I have a possible solution worth some thought Prime Minister. I think that you will agree that we must get these women away from the press for the time being.”

“ We can not order them to be shot unfortunately, this country is a democracy and we have the bye elections to think about.” The Prime Minister retorted.

“ I know Prime Minister but how about the Grange.” The Prime Minister stopped, looked at him and thought for moment. “

“Good idea, let me have the details of how we do it as soon as you have sorted out the logistics .”

The Grange was a luxury, but very isolated and very secure country house brought into being during the ‘cold war’ to house certain suspected persons who could not be prosecuted in the courts, but who could have been an embarrassment to the government if they were allowed their freedom. It had been fitted out sparing no cost. To put them in prison was not legally possible, and it was an ideal place for a government to house awkward people and deny they knew of their whereabouts. Since the end of the cold war it had been fully maintained but never used. The few officials still in service who still knew of its existence were subject to the official secrets act, and were legally obliged to keep their knowledge secret..

It was in a remote area of countryside not far from London, surrounded by a high electric fence and guarded by the Admiralty police. Its upkeep was not a major expense. It was in a lovely location and very secure from prying eyes. Security was tight and well away from the main building, and any prying eyes. The more he thought about it, the more the Prime Minister liked the idea. The only problem was as far as he could see. How could he get them there and keep them there, without causing a scandal much later and who could head up the operation.?

The Home Secretary returned to a pile of paperwork at the home Office, but who to put in charge of the Grange still remained a problem and then he happened to pick up a piece of paper from the Director of MI5, requesting permission to retain and reassign Chief Superintendent Pat Noble seconded from the Metropolitan Police, rather than to return her to police duties. All assignments of senior officers had to have his personal approval and both the police and MI5 wanted to retain her services. He knew a lot about her background and it occurred to him that she would be the ideal person for the job. She was bright and was well known for using her initiative in a crisis. He decided then, that he would assign her to The Grange project.

Later that day , the Prime Minister gave a press conference he said.

” We regret certain reports of lewd behaviour in the press have not been to the credit of this government recently. But it must be noted that the reports relate to the wives of certain Ministers, not the Ministers conduct themselves. It does not in any way affect the efficiency of them as Ministers of the Crown in carrying out their duties. However, I have asked all members of the party to talk to their wives and immediate families to try to ensure that they act in a more socially becoming way in future as becomes their station in the community.”