Nothing Warm

Floodgates. The torrent was not just words. As much as I had opened my mind and soul, the water-sprite allowed me into her soul and body, shedding her river nymph outfit and roaming free over our gentle waters.

Our gentle waters. She took my virginity.

I had seen enough. I had heard enough. And I’m sure she had made love before. It didn’t matter what we each had known. She crawled over me, feeling my body and rubbing her own soft body into mine – touching me, sensing me and letting my skin and intuitions rub over hers.

We were exploratory. Her fingertips brushed past too many sensitive spots on my body, her lips found a home on my neck, her teeth gentle on my earlobe, her nipples and my own connecting. My fingers found her clit without my conscious help. Her sighs found my neck in warm breaths, the song of her moans reaching my ear as she tensed and gripped my back. I almost came from this contact alone, but that was before Sasha licked my stomach. Then pet my soft fuzz while my hands ended up gripping her own back before stroking her head as I first felt the bliss of a woman’s tongue on my clit. Her tongue moved so fast; she seemed never to tire. She pet my stomach as her tongue slid so quickly up and down. I was in paradise – I could have been here or on a cloud and I could not have told the difference. I feared for her endurance, but this manifested itself in further pleasure, as the lapping morphed into suction, and the tight, beautiful fluid feeling in my pussy felt almost drawn from my body. In the suction, her tongue still brushed against my clit, and I was about to come. At the last second, two fingers slid into my body, and the pain was lost in the indescribable pleasure. My cum – that closest to my inside – squirted onto Sasha’s tongue, and I was silenced from protest when I saw the calm demeanor on my lover’s face, and the hazing of her eyes into a horny oblivion.

I dove into her, inhaling the scent of her sex attractant hormones, and started to cleanse her opening of its own lube. I learned to lick, increasing in speed, and was rewarded by her perpetual moaning. She too stroked my head and ears, but I was surprised when she asked for a break to kiss me and suddenly started rubbing my clit again. I twisted and licked her sideways as her hand massaged my clit quickly enough to tense my body. 

I came when she did. I collapsed, again, into Sasha’s embrace. 

We fell asleep, to awaken late the next morning, my head still upon her. When she woke up and pet my hair, smiling, she gently set me onto the pillow and sat up, naked. Her serenity deepened as she stared out the window from the edge of her bed her hand still upon me.

“Sweety?”

“Accchhh…” I whined disgustedly. “Rain?”

“Snow.”

****

PART 3

Thaw

“Back to Virginia?” I screamed like a New York Jew, in an absurd juxtaposition to Sasha’s soft Southern drawl. “What, for some fucking girlfriend of yours?”

“I have no girlfriend. But I want to go home.”

“I won’t ask why. But don’t… You’re the only real friend I have… and the only one I’ve ever loved…”

“No I’m not, and you know that.”

“I know.” I looked up sadly. “I can’t lose you too.”

I helped her pack and followed her to her car. I had been with Sasha for three months, and it was time to go. It was March.

“Don’t leave me, Sasha.”

“I’m not leaving you. I swear I will see you again.”

“If you loved me, why would you drive me into the ground?”

The look was first anger, then sadness. “Alex, if you love me, why would you drive yourself into the ground? You can’t just stay with yourself for me?”

I launched into her willowy body, once again holding her in a flowing water-sprite dress. “I will be like you. I swear I will try to be as great as you are, my angel.”

Nothing better for me to do than drive her back to Virginia, go back to my job and apartment, and finish senior year.

The proverb reads “Give a man a fish and he’ll eat for a day; teach him how to fish and he’ll eat forever.” A woman likes to keep warm. When there is nothing warm, she has but to cover herself and others to perpetuate human warmth. And with two people, the warmth of love may thrive. Sasha had covered me and taught me to cover myself; for love I could have searched out another to intensify our heat, but first I chose to share my new heat with pure humanity – other women I could see that would shiver.

Jamie. Sasha. Sam. I see each of them at some point every so often to this day – Jamie’s smile in a random constellation or in one of my clients’ shining eyes, Sasha on the phone or in good old Virginia on one of my visits. We hike the Blue Ridge Mountains at twilight, looking at the stars, and Sasha tells me about her life and her new wife. 

And Sam… I only approached her that day in the lunchroom because her sobbing resembled the shudder of chill. I only spoke to her and for her because I wanted to share my warmth and impart it to her. I only stayed in pursuit of her – despite her naïveté, delusions of purity, wariness of humanity, and bad choices to compensate for these things – I only stayed because I loved her and did not want to leave her.

Jamie. Sasha. Sam. All are still with me, Jamie is dead, Sasha I rarely see. But Sam…

I’ll see her tomorrow.