Engkanto

Alex wanted to end everything tonight. He decided that tonight he would let go of the boy and at the same time free himself. Free himself from what? Alex didn’t exactly know. He didn’t even know if he could. But, he wanted to try.

Alex turned off the lights and was about to lie down to sleep. But, Alex didn’t have to sleep to get to the forest. Everything around her just began to move away from her as the ceiling of her room disappeared to reveal the night sky that was clear and starry. When Alex looked down, he saw that grasses were sprouting out of the ground that used to be the floor of his room. Then trees began to shoot out of the soil and towered all over him. Everything happened very fast and Alex was instantly brought back in the forest.

Alex looked around and saw the boy standing, waiting for him, and looking straight at him. His face was unusually sad and sullen, as if he knew what was on Alex’s mind. He looked as if he was asking why. Why did he have to leave him?

Alex’s heart sank. He had never seen the boy look like this before and he felt very sorry for him. 

Alex walked toward the boy, but the boy looked away turning his head to his right. Alex was now in front of the boy and was very close to him.

“Why did he look away?” Alex thought. The answer came to him as he saw that tears were actually falling from the boy’s eyes. Alex’s heart was like being torn into pieces. He hugged the boy leaning his head on his left shoulder.

“I’m sorry…” Alex managed to speak as tears were beginning to fall from his eyes as well. “Yawa!” He thought. “I never thought I could be so full of shit. I can’t believe I’m actually doing this. I like this boy a lot and now I’m letting go of him.”

“I’m very sorry…” Alex said again. The boy shifted his head over Alex’s shoulders and hugged Alex as well, moving his hand over his back as if comforting him. Alex hugged the boy tighter feeling the boy against him.

The boy carried Alex still clasped to him, and had him seated on a rock as he knelt in front of him. They began to make love and this time they were slower. Alex held the boy by the neck as the boy worked on his pants.

When Alex was completely undressed, the boy had him laid on the ground and kissed him once again. Alex closed her eyes and tried to feel everything of the boy on his body. He felt the boy’s lips on his lips. He felt the boy’s legs against his legs. He felt their hard penises between their bodies. He wanted to savor the moment. He wanted to take so much pleasure in what would probably be the last time that they would be together.

Alex felt that the boy’s lips had moved away from his lips. He was about to open his eyes again but he felt the boy’s mouth on his neck. He held the boy’s head closer to him. The boy moved down to the side of Alex’s breast just below the armpit, licking and nuzzling his mouth on it. The boy’s mouth traveled all over Alex’s body, pleasurably tormenting him.

When the boy was back on Alex’s mouth, Alex rolled over so that he was now on top of him. It was now his turn to explore the boy’s body, which he actually had searched already every time they had sex.

They made love slowly that night trying to make the most of what could be their last sex and every time they climaxed, it would be so intense.

When Alex woke up from that night, he was very tired but she felt rather light. He felt sorry for the boy and for himself as well. But, he was happy, though because he knew that what he did was in some way good for him.

…

The events of the past days were very strange and unbelievable for Alex. He had met a very mysterious boy, whom he had sex with and fallen in love with, and whom he had let go of after a very, very short time. He had been having sex with the boy and every time he wakes up from those nights when they did it, he feels exhausted and much drained. But, Alex had enjoyed anyway. He didn’t bother to look for explanations and he didn’t want to be thought as crazy so he decided not to let anyone know. He just considered those incidents as part of his experiences.

Things had been back to normal for Alex. He regained his appetite and his regular sleep. Everything was okay, except that he was kind of missing the boy. He had no idea who the boy was. He didn’t even know if the boy was human. Although he had no pictures of the boy to remind him of how the boy looked like, he could still clearly see the boy in his mind, whenever he thinks about him.

…

It was already June and classes had begun for the 1st semester of the next school year. It was Alex’s first day at school and his first day as a college student. He was in the canteen waiting for his first class that day, which would be in about two hours. The canteen was very full of students who were having their breakfast after their 7:30-8:30 A.M. classes. Alex had already had his and he was just sitting now; his table was at a corner near a window. He was watching through the window at the river that ran beside the canteen, when someone walked towards him.

“Can I share this table with you? All the tables seem to be full.” A boy was standing in font of him.

Alex looked up and was shocked to see that the boy standing in front of him looked exactly and unmistakably like the boy whom he met in the forest, except that the boy had short hair and brown eyes that were not luminous. But, his face, his build, and his bearing were very much like that of the boy from the forest. Everything about him was just strangely similar to that of the boy, even the way he moves and the way he looked at Alex.

“But if you don’t want me to, then I’ll have to sit somewhere else,” the boy said, smiling at Alex.

“Oh…No, it’s okay…”

“I also like to watch the river from here.” The boy placed his tray on the table and seated in front of Alex. “By the way, I’m Jose.”

Alex was still staring at the boy, amazed and staggered by the semblance between the boy that was in front of him and the boy that he met in the forest.

“Are you okay? Is everything alright?”

“Oh, yeah…I’m okay. Umm…I’m…”

“Alex. Yeah, I know…”

“You know?” Alex was more stunned now as things were beginning to strangely make sense.

“We’ve already met each other, remember? Holy week? Or, have you already forgotten me completely?”

It was very clear to Alex, now.

The boy held Alex’s hands in his. “I missed you, Alex.”

Alex couldn’t say anything. He was wordless. He wanted to hug him, and kiss him right there and then, but people were all around the canteen. All he could do was watch him as he let go of his hands and begun to eat.

“Do you want to eat?”

“Thanks, I’ve already had breakfast earlier.”

Jose finished his meal.

“Let’s go we’re going to be late.”

“We’re going to be classmates?”

“In all the subjects,” Jose answered. “I made sure of that when I enrolled.”

They went together to their first class. They wished they could hold each other’s hands, but people were all around. They just cannot wait to be alone with each other again.